Life after Africa...

It's been exactly a month since my trip to Ghana.  Leaving my family, whether it's just for the weekend in the mountains or across the Atlantic to Africa, is hard!  The older the girls get, the more I miss them, and not having my best friend by my side when I travel is just not as fun.  But this last trip was one without a single regret, with peace through it's entirety, and a week I'll never forget.

Walking off the plane in Ghana felt as though I was walking into a sauna.  Immediately, the differences in culture became obvious as I stood in line waiting for customs.  Nervous feelings arose as I prayed that my luggage would arrive safely and that someone would be there to greet me outside the airport as I knew my sister had just had her baby while I was traveling.  But my worries quickly faded as two blond boys, their daddy, and my sweet mama stood out among the crowd waiting to take me to the hospital.

What a blessing it was to see Joy and my brand new nephew, Enoch Graham within hours of his birth!  To see the happiness in the big brothers faces as they too met their littlest brother for the first time! My admiration and respect for my sister only sky rocketed as I took in the conditions of the hospital (which was one of the best in the area).  

My main purpose in visiting Joy & her family was to spend some quality time with them, meet my new nephew, and to help entertain Joy's oldest two.  What fun they were!  I was nervous before going, wondering what to do with boys, as girls are what I'm familiar with. But they were such a blessing to play with!  Blankets, super heroes, forts with couch pillows, chalk drawing, and "football" outside were just a few of our daily activities.  

Eating coconut, fresh from a local seller

Spending a week with these little guys did amazing things on my heart.  Quality time with Titus at 4:30 am some mornings made me want to kiss those cheeks all the more.  Listening to Ezra's stories of super heroes, defeating the bad guys, and protecting his mama made me a proud aunt.  Sharing one of my favorite picture books, Roxaboxen and watching the movie, Home, with him multiple times will always bring a smile when I see them again.

The smell of a new baby.  There are no words to describe it.  Tears fill my eyes as I gratefully praise our Lord for allowing me the privilege of holding my newest nephew.  God's timing still amazes me!  My plans are certainly not His plans, but how much better His are!

Having my mama in Ghana was a God-send as well.  Anyone that knows her realizes how incredible she is.  To travel around the world to witness the birth of her 8th grandchild (as she hasn't missed a birth yet!), she is quick to step into any role (cook, dishwasher, laundry lady, story-teller, playmate, and so much more). 

One of the trash trucks

A man carrying three bundles of water sachets

Ghana is like no country I've ever visited before.  The poverty, the dirt, the heat...  Pictures and even videos can't even begin to cast a glimpse of life in Ghana.  Even my stay there couldn't accurately show me the day to day life my sister and her husband have been living for the last year.  While staying at the guest house, I had the luxury of warm showers (even though sometimes I chose the cold water), a washing machine and dryer, constant electricity when every other street around that block has scheduled power outages, and not a single mosquito bite!  Everything we did was an "experience."  Riding in a car or taxi was an experience.  Ryan has adapted so well to the traffic there.  He does such a great job maneuvering through all the cars and people! Shopping is an experience.  Bartering in the market was quite thrilling (and sweaty!)  Even attending church was an experience.  Hearing the sermon in two languages, both of which were difficult to understand, and the length of the service made that Sunday one that I'd never forget.  

The yard outside the guest house

Typical housing

Pounding out fufu

You buy just about anything on the streets.

As I mentioned earlier, life as a missionary in Ghana cannot be fully comprehended unless you observe it first hand.  Washing dishes must be done with boiling water, first in the wash bucket then in the rinse.  None of this "quick rinse" under the faucet due to the lack of sanitation.  Same goes for brushing teeth.  Water sachets are always beside the bathroom sinks.  Even buying local eggs involve a process before eating.  Because the eggs are most likely carrying bacteria, they must be dry scrubbed before rinsing under water as egg shells are porous and will absorb the bacteria with water if it's not removed first.  Things we never even think of here.

Dry season arrived while I was there, which was a blessing concerning the lack of mosquitoes, but it also brought with it a haze across the sky due to the sand coming off of the Sahara Desert, and constant dust that covered furniture in the house.  These are only a few of the day to day tasks that are so very different from what we experience in the states.

The time I had with Joy will never be forgotten, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.  She truly lives out her name (even when life seems unbearable).  Daily, the Lord showed me ways to pray more specifically for Joy and her family.  Life as a missionary is hard. You can't soften it or really describe it.  It's just hard, yet God is still good.  When He calls, He will equip, even if it only seems on a moment by moment basis.  God taught me more than I thought possible through this trip.  He opened my eyes to my own selfishness, to my complaining heart, to my petty desires, and my need for pure contentment in Him.  

P.S. These three girls were amazing while I was away!  

So thankful for Facetime!

Reflections on the move

(Wrote this a month ago...)

It's been over a week now since we've moved in and it still feels like we just started.  The house is a mess, the garage is full of boxes, need to sell more things, clean more things, the rain... the list could go on.  

Here are some reflections that I jotted down while knee deep in packing and now unpacking:

- You know you're tired when you reheat the same beans three days in a row for lunch, only to finally throw them away.
- Finding balance in washing the clothes, packing the clothes, and selling your washer and dryer.  It all gets done.
- Little piles everywhere because all the bookcases and end tables are either packed in a pod or sold.
- Just accepting sickness when it comes, even if it messes up your free childcare plans, thus experiencing mommy guilt no matter what.
- Saying goodbye to neighbors never gets easier, especially when one of them is 83 and adores our girls more than anything.
- Packing 5 boxes a night sounded like a good idea...
- Never again!!! (what I kept saying the last day, along with song, "I am overwhelmed...")
- Sometimes it seemed as though our stuff was giving birth.  We'd come upstairs and there would be more than before!

After a few days being in the house, I was experiencing a combination of weariness due to lack of sleep, seasonal depression since it has rained every day since moving in, maybe a little buyers remorse, and just downright discouragement.  So after breakfast the girls and I sat down and gave thanks because when gratitude is present, it's harder to complain.  

Here's just a portion of our list:
- big, fenced in backyard
- a beautiful patio
- new washing machine and dryer
- wood floors downstairs
- fun bedrooms
- 2 stories with the main living area downstairs
- a big kitchen
- quiet and safe neighborhood
- a long driveway
- fireplace
- nice neighbors
- trees in the backyard (and lots of leaves = good upper body workout for mommy)
- close to Porter Farms
- big back and front porches
- storm doors so Samson can look outside 

We are blessed!  So very thankful for God's many provisions!

Gypsy Blood

Moving?  Yes, we are moving again!  We have already received a plethora of questions and statements, so hopefully this post will answer a few of those.

"You just moved!"

- Actually we moved into this home over four years ago.  Even the five of us have a hard time believing that it's been that long.

"You just finished your downstairs!"

- It's been over a year since it's been completed and we have loved it!  My large school room away from the rest of the house has really been a blessing!  Marty did such an amazing job with the help of friends and family (and a good chunk of tax money.)  Honestly, the only reason we could afford to live in this neighborhood was due to the unfinished downstairs.  God blessed us immensely by providing this house at just the right time.

"You live in such a great area!"

- We have loved our neighborhood, especially our neighbors right around us!  Smores & movie nights, special friends for our girls, the pool, the list could go on...  We have loved the proximity to our church, extra curricular school activities, and Target.  Let's be honest.

                              

"Why are you moving back to Willow Spring?"

- We weren't looking in Willow Spring specifically.  We always try to live as close to the church as possible, but ultimately, we desired more land and less house (the opposite of the American dream).  We didn't want to put our current house on the market until we found just the right house.  And we all truly believe that we did!

"How are the girls coping?"

- Amazingly!!  Marty and I have said again and again how resilient they are.  After we had another dream house fall through a month ago, I promised to never take them house hunting again.  But without much choice, they came to see the house we are buying and we all fell in love with it!  They have been faithfully packing, each in their own way.  They have helped clean, do school work in random places, and watched many belongings be given away, sold, or tossed without complaint.  I simply couldn't ask for sweeter children.  

"Why move at all?"

- We have asked ourselves this question many times.  But we have several reasons why we are: 

1) More land and less house, as mentioned earlier. 

2) Gypsy blood.  Not really, but we'll claim it as both of us grew up moving often throughout our childhood.  

3) We want to put down roots.  To be honest, the last 18 months have been stressful.  Without a pastor, my associate pastor husband carried a little extra and we can only claim God's strength and His grace to have gotten us through it.  We had prayed over our future. Would overseas be an option? Should we move to another state for a job with more focus? Will we be able to blend well with our new pastor and his family? God has clearly answered no to the first two questions and has brought such peace to the last.  We are so excited for the ministry to come at Fairview and feel very blessed to have our pastor!  So, with that said, we feel that God has called us to stay in this area and we want to live in a house for the long-haul.    

We knew that our current home was not our dream house.  Never would be.  But even with all the wishful thinking, this place has seen a lot of dreams come true.  Our littlest learned to walk in this house, cartwheels and handstands were perfected throughout the living room, each of our girls became confident swimmers in our neighborhood pool, and our home was available to family on their way to Japan and Ghana. 

So in less than two weeks, when we pull out of the driveway for the very last time, I'll hold back the tears.  "Tears for all the dreams brought to life here.  Tears for all the dreams waiting ahead.  But mostly, tears for the God that never abandons this fixer upper, no matter what kind of flooring she's living on."

This Year

When I thought homeschooling couldn't get any harder by teaching three grades with three entirely different learners, our family decided to add the joys of moving to the chaos. No lie... first day of school began with cinnamon rolls (thanks to Trader Joe's refrigerated section), followed by crazy cleaning and prepping to get our house staged to put on the market by the end of the week.   

More sugar followed as we packed up the dog and headed to Chick-fil-a for free milkshakes (drive-thru, of course!).  Formal school didn't really happen until afternoon due to the lovely stayed-up-too-late-hangover Mommy got to enjoy.  Thank you, Magic School Bus on Netflix!

These three!  They are some of the greatest joys of my life!  (Yet can drive me crazy at the same time!)  It will be a fun year, to say the least!

Lunch included more Netflix by watching "On the Way to School."  Excellent documentary!  All three of my girls were mesmerized. The stories of several children around the world and their daily or weekly walks to school was quite humbling!

School supplies were simple, but useful as we also like new markers, notebooks, and glue sticks.  It was fun to watch them fill out their 1st Day of School Interviews (found here) and then compare them with last year's.  

Each girl picked out one subject to do before calling it a day and heading to church.  We are excited to try some new curriculum this year.  Chloe's adding Wordly Wise for vocabulary & spelling. Naomi is starting cursive handwriting with Cheerful Cursive, and Sophie is using Horizon Math, which we've never tried before. 

Overall, the day was nothing to boast about.  It was certainly not as exciting as other "first days," but I can promise you that none of us will ever forget it.  At some point during the day, we listened to one of JJ Heller's newer songs called "This Year."  Check it out on YouTube.  As Emily Freeman says, I'm treating September like the new January.  A new home, a new school year, and a new perspective...

Here are some links that I'm gleaning from these days:

- 10 Tips For a Stress-Free Homeschool Day by Ruth Simmons
- Amongst Lovely Things with Sarah Mackenzie (Love it all!  Her blog, her podcast, tips, etc)
- The Homeschool Snapshots Podcast

(This was written last week, but due to technical difficulties, I couldn't post it until today.  Two weeks of homeschooling under the belt...)

What I'm reading, still reading, and want to read...

Some of these books I'm still trying to finish reading (Love & Respect, Own Your Life).  Both really good books, just not something I can pick up, snuggle down and read for extended period of time (without falling asleep).  The Antelope in the Living Room is a friend's copy that I'm trying to save for bedtime reading since I could probably finish it in a day or two, especially after reading Sparkly Green Earrings.

The Fringe Hours and The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up came via Amazon last week, both books that I've seen sprinkled all over social media and many of my favorite blogs. The Fringe Hours I'm saving till I finish some of the other books I'm currently reading. But I'm excited to dive into a book designed to show women how "to take back the fringe hours - those little pockets of time you already have in your day - in order to make time for your passions and practice self-care." The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying up (the Japanese art of decluttering and organizing) is already scaring the living daylights out of me and I'm only in the third chapter.  The thought of gathering every single piece of clothing in my house, placing them on the floor, and sorting through them one by one. My worst nightmare!  No promises yet, but I'm eager to finish reading it.  We'll see...

What I've Learned This Summer

It is simply hard to believe that it's already August!  I knew this summer would fly by, but now that we're on the count down to school, the reality is hitting me.  I've spent a lot of time reflecting, processing life in general, and looking ahead, seeing a new season with the middle school years approaching.

Blogger and writer Emily Freeman, from Chatting at the Sky, blogs at the end of each month different and often random things she's learned.  Since I fell off the "goal" bandwagon for a while and didn't even get our summer desires blogged, I thought I'd share a few things I've learned over the summer.

1.  Charleston is an amazing city!  We've loved visiting it for over ten years now, but this was the first time I've stayed there alone with my girls (since Marty was in North Charleston at camp). I literally drove past the church affected by the shooting rampage only thirty minutes before the shots were fired.  Fear, questions, apprehension immediately filled my mind after hearing about it. But to watch the city continue to move with such grace and love was a testimony to the many churches and the people within that city.  I learned a lot in those few days.

2.  Blueberries always taste better straight from the bush.  While Chloe and I continued to pick that hot Saturday morning, my younger two literally sat under the bushes and ate to their hearts content.

3.  My baby is growing up!  I know I didn't learn this over the summer, but it's becoming even more real as she's learning to swim and ride a bike without training wheels.  Shhh!  Don't remind me that she's almost ready for kindergarten.  Thank goodness I finally finished her baby book!

4.  Even though it's easier now that our girls are older, I learned that I still really miss my hubbie when he's gone on mission trips.  I just really like having him around! 

5.  Having a dog can really cramp my traveling style!  This was our first summer having Samson (whom we love very much!), but it's tough when you want to travel and you have to make pet arrangements.  Oh well!  First world problems!

6.  Focus on the blessings, rather than succumbing to the loneliness. This is an area that God is still teaching me.  There will always be a measure of loneliness in ministry, but I felt it more than ever when Marty left on July 4th.  Family being so far away and memories flooding back from the previous summer with my sisters and their families brought me to tears more than once.  But my girls can make any day interesting and we embraced the sprinkler and the sparklers, making the day memorable in our own way.

7.  Family is important and worth the effort.  Since Samson cramped my traveling style, we enjoyed #campcousins week instead!  My sister graciously took my girls for a few days.  Then, we enjoyed a day at the zoo, and a few more days with them at our house.  It was a fun full week!

8.  I "need" inspiration!  I love a good pen, a comfortable notebook, the perfect lighting, clean surroundings.  I think it's why I love Instagram so much!  The pictures, colors, inspiring words fill me up.

9.  The show, When Calls the Heart, on Netflix took me back to my teenage years.  That same, "I've just got to read one more chapter..." feeling consumed me, but in the form of Netflix.  I watched show after show while exercising on the elliptical, folding laundry, cooking supper... until the last show, and I didn't know it was the last show!  So I have now learned that when watching a series on Netflix or Amazon Prime, look and see how many episodes there are before diving in headlong, fully engrossed in the flowing plot, only to discover you just watched the last one!

10.  It is important to label homemade sprays.  Otherwise your daughters may mistaken your cellulite spray for bug repellent.